Learning to not be afraid

2 Jun

When I was younger I was incredibly shy.  Looking back, I now think it was almost a social anxiety.  I was afraid to ask for help in a store, if anyone I didn’t know spoke to me I would answer in as short and brief an answer as possible.  I have pretty much outgrown this, and interacting with people on a daily basis at my job has definitely helped me curb that awkwardness.  One thing I’ve learned from working in a customer service type position is how draining it can be.  It takes every ounce and inch of me to keep that happy, peppy attitude all day.  Some days I come home and just melt from exhaustion.  It gets better and better each and every day, but after nearly three years, you’d think it would be easy now.  It has been a great experience for me, becoming more comfortable and talking to people with ease.  Something so basic and simple, it’s a wonder how it has become a struggle in our society for some people.

We are all human, what are we so afraid of?

I was afraid.  I was scared of not knowing people’s reactions, their judgement and opinions of me.  What does it matter?  My self-worth should not be so tied-up in other people’s perceptions of me.  How high school is that?  I know I’m pretty badass-awesome now, but even a few years ago I was always wondering if anyone else thought that.  I JUST WANT YOU TO LIKE ME.

After all that I’ve been through since then, I’ve learned to not let that kind of stuff hold me back. If you want to change, you are going to feel some discomfort.   At 5:30 a.m. when I’m sweating like a pig and swearing up a storm to Jillian Michael’s work-out DVD, I just try to keep thinking of all the fat I’m burning off.  Physical or emotional, you have to push through the painful parts to get to the good stuff.

I really didn’t mean this post to go in this direction, but hey, that’s what happens when I just sit down and type without really having a direction.  It’s kind of like watching a rat go through a maze!


One Response to “Learning to not be afraid”

  1. kyleighrain June 2, 2012 at 6:00 am #

    I couldn’t agree more, as long as youre comfortable with who you are, screw what others think!

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